Disinterested with life again

I might have the chance to get a regular job and make some money for once in my life. This could be the start of something. I don't want it. Once again, I've found a way to hate everything in life that could offer me stability and security. This isn't healthy and this isn't normal. I suppose this is going to be a continuing theme for the rest of my life. I know of nothing that can change my mind.

If God himself came to me and offered me into his kingdom, I'd probably turn it down. I'd find another way to destroy it and myself. I'm going to give it a shot. I don't know how long I'll last, but I'll try it. Somewhere down the line I'll become disinterested and disillusioned and decide it was a waste of time for me, the scary thing is, I don't know what WON'T be a waste of time for me in my life.

I'm in Temp Hell, but I'm not jobless

I have a job! (yay!) But it's a temp job (nay). It's not so bad though. I have a 2nd interview lined up with Enterprise, so hopefully that'll come through and I won't have to do these kinds of things to make ends meat.

Another Week and I'm still jobless

As the title states. I'm not really that worried. I have a temp job lined up and I'm still heavily considering a move to NYC. I don't know if much will change if I decide to pack my stuff up and go, being that tactic didn't work for me here. It seems as though things tend not to work for me anyway, but it's still worth a shot.

I guess that optimistic teenager in my never died like I thought he did. He was a young man of high hopes and big dreams, when the world around him changed, the young man died a slow and arguably sad death. Like anyone that dies, pieces of him or her continues to exist in all of us.